Disappointment
I am disappointed with myself and my ability. Being curious about the emotion, it says this to be "that I am not able to achieve the goal that I had set for myself at the beginning of this year, to be more reckless".
I need to stop freezing up, stop allowing my friends to introduce me to people, instead of going up to them myself.
It doesn't help that an old torch was there tonight. Disappointment in seeing her, and seeing what could have been. Probably not helpful that she was drunk and dancing with me! So it was double disappointment.
So what's the new goal?
The new goal is to find the right partner. However, prior to that, the goal is to be willing to talk to any girl that want to. Don't care what I say, just hi! Be happy and make other people happy!
True Confidence is being less invested in other people’s perceptions of you than in your perception of yourself.
Don't care what they say! Just do it! I shrug if the women I pursue has no interest in me. Such is life :)
Continue to invest in myself. Make myself the best person I can be. Then find someone who will meet my standard. If they do not, walk away. Be benevolently selfish with the women in my life.
"Hi my name is Kev, I think you are very pretty and I just wanted to say hi. So what are we celebrating tonight?" "What is your favourite thing in the world?"
Rejection exists for a reason — it’s a means to keep people who are not good for each other apart. Remember that it's ok to be rejected. No one will die, especially not me!
And for God's sake please move on from the old torch. No use carrying that one around! I can do one final proclamation?? :) Just remember boundaries. If we are friends, then we shouldn't be grinding each other. Respect my boundary. Next time remember that.
What stories am I telling myself?
That dancing by myself it ok, and I shouldn't meet people directly. That is wrong!
That I am no good at approaching new women. I am actually ok, sometimes it's a nudge. But I don't like it that people have to introduce them to me. I should be going up to them myself.
That I hate rejection. I am changing that story to say that rejection is good as it separates the right women for me compared to the wrong women, and the sooner I find out, the better!
When approaching, I pretend I have apathy to the girl when really I am interested. I do care and I do want to meet that girl. Say hi to every girl that I think is cute, no matter what happens. Just hi and introduce myself!! It is not hard!
But confidence simply means to feel the fear and not let it define you. True Confidence is feeling the fear and deciding that something else is more important.
Step by step, keep training the approach muscle. Start with less difficult actions, move to more difficult ones.